Navigation Links
Same-Sex Relationships Pose Abuse Risks, Too

By Serena Gordon
HealthDay Reporter

FRIDAY, May 10 (HealthDay News) -- Though many teens find it difficult to talk about dating violence or abuse, the shroud of secrecy may be even harder to get through for same-sex couples.

New York resident Sheila Rodriguez, 26, was just 13 years old when she started dating another girl in her school. She said it was about a year before the relationship took a decidedly nasty turn.

"At first, it was all verbal abuse -- putting each other down and name calling," Rodriguez recalled. "We made each other mentally dependent on one another so that neither of us could find someone better."

Then things escalated. "The name-calling led to pushing, shoving, grabbing and eventually, at its worst, scratching, slapping and choking," she said.

Both girls were guilty of abusing the other. "Sadly, it never really occurred to me that this was wrong," Rodriguez said. "And, if it did for her, she never said so out loud."

Rodriguez said they would come up with excuses for the physical evidence left on them, like saying that bruises were from gym class or that scratches were from the sharp edges of a locker or the family dog. But, she said, few really questioned the marks on them. The other girl's mother did ask but apparently was satisfied with the given explanation, she said.

"Throughout the relationship, the only way we discussed the violence was how to cover it up," Rodriguez said. "It was a very 'us against the world' relationship that no one would understand -- we thought. We didn't want to be kept apart or get in trouble. It was our first real relationship, and it's almost like we didn't know anything different."

She said she's sure that if she had been dating a young man, her parents and others would have raised concerns, but because she was with a girl, no one suspected that violence could be an issue. The situation even blinded both girls to their dysfunctional relationship, she added.

Their final argument, which happened five years after they started dating, was the first time they discussed "stopping the behavior," Rodriguez said. "After swings and blows and each other threatening to call the cops on the other, you sort of sit there out of breath, like, how did we get here?"

Rodriguez said this was the only relationship she's been in where she experienced violence. She said she's learned to walk away if tensions in other relationships escalate to the point where she feels uneasy.

Her advice to others who might find themselves in a similar situation? "No matter what type of relationship you are in, no one deserves to be verbally or physically abused," Rodriguez said. "The very first hit in a relationship to me makes it a matter of time before it ends. A trust is broken and you never truly feel safe. Trust the voice in the back of your mind, and love yourself enough to make a change if necessary."

More information

A companion article offers more on teen dating violence.

SOURCE: Sheila Rodriguez, Westchester County, N.Y.

Copyright©2012 ScoutNews,LLC.
All rights reserved  

Related medicine news :

1. Same-Sex Parents May Face Harsher Criticism Than Others
2. New study suggests that same-sex parents are judged more harshly than heterosexual parents
3. Child Health Experts Come Out in Favor of Same-Sex Marriage
4. Cohabiting Same-Sex Couples Report Worse Health Than Married Heterosexuals
5. Studying the health of same-sex couples
6. Study: Same-sex cohabitors less healthy than those in heterosexual marriages
7. Same-Sex Couples Might File Tax Refund Claims According to Watson CPA Group
8. UC research explores relationship-building program for male same-sex couples
9. Foster Kids Adopted by Same-Sex Parents Make Big Gains, Study Says
10. Risk of depression influenced by quality of relationships, U-M research says
11. Vein Specialists of Arizona Launches Physician Directory to Build Relationships with Area Doctors
Post Your Comments:
Related Image:
Same-Sex Relationships Pose Abuse Risks, Too
(Date:11/26/2015)... ... November 26, 2015 , ... WorldCare International, ... in the 61st annual Employee Benefits Conference. The Employee Benefits Conference was hosted ... 8th through Wednesday, November 11th, 2015. The conference was held at the Hawaii ...
(Date:11/26/2015)... (PRWEB) , ... November 26, ... ... online platform for mental health and wellness consultation, has collaborated with Women’s ... holistically address their reader’s queries on topics on mental and emotional well-being ...
(Date:11/25/2015)... ... November 25, 2015 , ... ... aggressive than those found on mammography, according to a study published online in ... cancers not seen on mammography may necessitate a change in treatment. , Breast ...
(Date:11/25/2015)... (PRWEB) , ... November 25, 2015 , ... ... gatherings where preparing the perfect dish and pleasing the palates of attendees is ... or bringing a dish to a seasonal get-together, give these recipes a try ...
(Date:11/25/2015)... ... November 25, 2015 , ... Medical Solutions, one ... for its stellar workplace culture with the company’s Cincinnati office being named a ... Cincinnati office was named a finalist in Cincinnati Business Courier’s 13th annual Greater ...
Breaking Medicine News(10 mins):
(Date:11/26/2015)... Research and Markets ( ) ... Future Horizons and Growth Strategies in the Italian ... Segment Forecasts, Competitive Intelligence, Emerging Opportunities" report ... --> This new 247-page report ... drug monitoring market, including emerging tests, technologies, instrumentation, ...
(Date:11/25/2015)... 2015  The total global healthcare industry is expected to ... Latin America has the highest projected growth ... Japan ), is second with growth projected at ... increased healthcare expenditure. In 2013-2014, total government funded healthcare was ... 2008-2009 to 41.2% in 2013-2014. In real terms, out of ...
(Date:11/25/2015)... , Nov. 25, 2015 AAIPharma Services ... investment of at least $15.8  Million to expand ... Wilmington, NC . The expansion will provide ... meet the growing demands of the pharmaceutical and ... site expansion will provide up to 40,000 square ...
Breaking Medicine Technology: