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Expert suggests tried-and-true strategies to strengthen your relationship
Date:1/9/2013

ies work, challenges may arise when couples don't see or value each other's efforts in the same way. These approaches had the most influence on the quality of the relationship when persons believed their partner was also performing relationship maintenance, he said.

The study suggests that what you do doesn't matter as much as whether the things you're doing are noticed by your partner. In other words, he said, relationship quality is not only at risk when couples don't employ these strategies, but also when one partner believes the other is not making an effort or doesn't recognize those efforts.

Sometimes a person's thoughts don't transfer into actions, he explained. "Say you've arrived home from work and your intention all day has been to buy some flowers for your partner and surprise her with dinner. Then you get wrapped up in a business phone call and your good intentions fall by the wayside. You may feel as if you've put considerable effort into your relationship, but your partner didn't see it so it does you no good."

The fact that couples get busy, become enmeshed in routines, and take each other for granted is all the more reason to consciously adopt these relationship strategies, he said.

"Even a small attempt at maintenance, such as asking how your partner's day was, sending a humorous text to make him laugh, or picking up the phone and calling your mother- or father-in-law, can have a positive impact on your relationship and make you happier," he added.


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Contact: Phyllis Picklesimer
p-pickle@illinois.edu
217-244-2827
University of Illinois College of Agricultural, Consumer and Environmental Sciences
Source:Eurekalert

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