Navigation Links
Connective Parenting Responds to Claims that High School is the Worst Place for Adolescents
Date:2/6/2013

Peterborough, NH (PRWEB) February 06, 2013

New adolescent research shows that success in the adult world has all to do with one's personality and looks at age sixteen. "Teens often enter high school looking to their peers for recognition and acceptance while rejecting parental control, says Bonnie Harris of Connective Parenting, but with connected parenting, teens have a better shot at higher self-esteem going in."

Physical attributes and social capabilities have direct correlation with earning power, successful relationships, and self-esteem in adult life, says Jennifer Senior in the recent edition of New York Magazine, even when experiences change in college or beyond.

Many studies on the developing brain of the adolescent report that important changes in the prefrontal cortex (the section that governs reason, impulsivity, comprehension of abstractions and self-reflection) are in process during the high school years but are not complete until the mid-twenties. Thus the more emotional, fight-flight-or-freeze parts of the brain—the limbic system—continue to have more hold on the teen experience.

This is why, as B.J. Casey, neuroscientist at Cornell University explains, adolescents are notoriously bad at self-regulation. Everything the teen does and feels is more intense, whether they are associated with good or bad experiences.

Lawrence Steinberg, developmental psychologist at Temple University says that the early years are critical to understanding how children learn in school, but the clues to why people turn out the way they do are found in the adolescent years.

High-schoolers who experience depression and social rejection continue to be impaired as adults, this article claims, even if depression ends and friends are made after high school. Who we were in high school predicts who we will be as adults.

The conclusion drawn by Senior, is that if teens behave and feel more intensely in adolescence than at any other time and are working out identity for the first time while preoccupied with how they appear to others, then “most American high schools are almost sadistically unhealthy places to send adolescents…. At the time they experience the most social fear, they have the least control; at the time they are most sensitive to the impressions of others, they’re plunked into an environment where it’s treacherously easy to be labeled and stuck on a shelf.” In other words, the high school experience is a recipe for shame.

Certainly many teens sail through high school successfully and with increased self-esteem, says Bonnie Harris. Is it because they are tall, attractive, and smart? Or is it because they have developed self-regulatory skills earlier on that help them cope through these years of vulnerability. Sometimes high school provides an environment suited to a student’s need; thus the student thrives. But certainly not in all cases.

Parenting connectively from the early years, Harris says, creates a solid foundation the child can stand on throughout those vulnerable, self-doubting, adolescent years. Connective Parenting aids the development of self-regulatory skills since the child problem solves rather than is punished, threatened and told what to do. Through acceptance and support, parents are able to teach even very young children strategies for managing their feelings and reactions instead of being overrun by them. Identity is stronger when the young child’s experience is reflected back supportively rather than criticized, praised and rewarded, or denied.

With Connective Parenting, the child learns:

  •     With acknowledgment, empathy, and acceptance: My feelings and experiences are normal and are understood by the most important people in my life.
  •     With problem solving: I can figure out how to handle situations and not be dependent on someone else to tell me what to do.
  •     With conflict resolution: I can express my feelings whatever they are and hear what some else has to say about me. Without blame or punishment, we can work out a solution.

"Blame, criticism, punishments, threats, and arbitrary consequences leave a child feeling powerless, misunderstood, and not good enough," says Harris,"—shaky ground on which to embark on even shakier adolescent ground. To enter adolescence with the well established shame intrinsic in traditional reward and punishment parenting is truly throwing our children into the lion’s den."

About Connective Parenting:
Bonnie Harris, M.S.Ed., parent educator for 25 years, founded Connective Parenting in 2003 with the release of her first book, "When Your Kids Push Your Buttons". Connective Parenting is based on principles, found in her second book, "Confident Parents, Remarkable Kids: 8 Principles for Raising Kids You'll Love to Live With," that focus on the child's strengths rather than inadequacies while creating a balance between the child's needs and the parent's. Harris teaches parenting workshops, professional trainings and gives speaking engagements internationally. For more information, call 603 924-6639 or visit http://www.connectiveparenting.com.

Read the full story at http://www.prweb.com/releases/2013/2/prweb10385755.htm.


'/>"/>
Source: PRWeb
Copyright©2012 Vocus, Inc.
All rights reserved

Related medicine news :

1. Connective Parenting asks: When It Comes to Mass Shootings—What About Parenting?
2. Science of parenting, the link between sexism and racism, death and the supernatural, and more
3. Source of conflict: Study finds factors that can shape divorced mothers co-parenting experiences
4. Chronic Cough Responds to Epilepsy Drug, Study Finds
5. Probiotic Action Responds an Article on ‘Skin Care Coaches’
6. VABC Responds to Study on Use of Cholesterol Lowering Drug Statins on Cancer Patients
7. Probiotic Action Responds to an Article Discussing the Health Benefits of Probiotics
8. Probiotic Action Responds to an Article Which Reports Alcohol Intake in Relation to Skin Health
9. Lorna Kleidman Responds to New Findings that Exercise Enhances Memory
10. Lorna Kleidman Responds to an Article Concerning Military Weight Loss
11. Probiotic Action Responds to Article Answering Common Questions About Acne
Post Your Comments:
*Name:
*Comment:
*Email:
(Date:10/13/2017)... ... October 13, 2017 , ... While it’s often important ... problem. Fortunately, an inventor from Austin, Texas, has identified a solution. , She developed ... darkness or restricted lighting. As such, it eliminates the need to turn on a ...
(Date:10/13/2017)... ... October 13, 2017 , ... ... Pharmacy (SOP) alumni Hannah Randall, PharmD ‘17, and Jennifer Huggins, PharmD ’17, ... guideline updates for the primary prevention of cardiovascular diseases during the 15th ...
(Date:10/13/2017)... ... October 13, 2017 , ... The Visiting Nurse Association (VNA) of ... collection of specialty vendors and unique items from across the nation, this holiday-themed event ... wellness services offered by the VNA. The boutique will be open Saturday, November ...
(Date:10/13/2017)... ... October 13, 2017 , ... Talented host, actor ... on sciatica in a new episode of "Success Files," which is an award-winning ... innovation and investigates each subject in-depth with passion and integrity. , Sciatica occurs ...
(Date:10/12/2017)... ... October 12, 2017 , ... First Healthcare ... program management, will showcase a range of technology and learning solutions at the ... Convention and Expo to be held October 14–18, 2017 at the Mandalay Bay ...
Breaking Medicine News(10 mins):
(Date:9/25/2017)... R.I. , Sept. 25, 2017  EpiVax, ... assessment, vaccine design, and immune-engineering today announced the ... on the development of personalized therapeutic cancer vaccines. ... has provided exclusive access to enabling technologies to ... Eng., MBA will lead EpiVax Oncology as Chief ...
(Date:9/22/2017)... , Sept. 22, 2017 AVACEN Medical ... device is now successfully helping those with the widespread ... Fibromyalgia diagnosed Amanda in Essex, England ... and washing my hair, experiencing no sleep at all, ... painful spasm… I cannot recommend [the AVACEN 100] enough, ...
(Date:9/18/2017)... KALAMAZOO, Mich. , Sept. 18, 2017 /PRNewswire/ ... and OptiMed Specialty Pharmacy of Kalamazoo, Mich. ... a strategic hub service that expedites and streamlines patient ... spirometer, Spiro PD 2.0, and wellness management services.  ... a medical device used to measure lung function for ...
Breaking Medicine Technology: